That Kit Kat is still in my drawer!
Smashed through pull-ups and push-ups yesterday. Did quite a few more negatives after my "I want to quit" moment! Those are the ones that count!
Already been for run (okay it is a jog!) this morning and went a bit further (and faster) again!
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Quick summary for the day...
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I studied for 100+ minutes (target 90)...
Again it was over this but hard to measure.
GTORB / review notes / session review.
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I played poker for 100 minutes (target 60)...
Feel really good. Mindset better every day!
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I meditated for 10 minutes (target 10)...
Box breathing, non guided.
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I studied mental game for 15 minutes (target 10)...
This part of MGOP is VERY good for me...
Mental Game Of Poker (Study Notes)
CHAPTER 6 - FEAR
In the poker world if you are not playing your best they call it "tilt". So anxiety and fear get barely noticed. "Defining tilt as just being caused by anger allows FEAR to emerge as a real contributor to mental game problems".
Fear could be there all along but without the ability to spot it I miss that it causes problems.
I might not realise that fear can be the cause of not thinking clearly or constantly checking past hands for mistakes - THIS SEEMS VERY RELEVANT TO ME ALREADY!
FEAR may show up in one fo these ways:-
I would say that only the last two of these do NOT apply to me although I have stopped checking the cashier since I have been studying this book and am improving in all of the others!!! And maybe the only reason I don't struggle sleeping after bad sessions is that I am so knackered!
THE NATURE OF FEAR
Fear = An accumulation of anxiety
Anxiety = An accumulation of doubt or uncertainty
Uncertainty is a question that I do not have an answer for or if i do have an answer I am not sure if it is correct. When these questions remain unanswered doubt lingers then accumulates into anxiety. Then that turns to fear after time.
Same as other emotions fear exists along a spectrum but it begins as just a question.
I need to dig into my fear to pull out the unanswered (or unproven) questions. Find out what these questions are as they will indicate what I need to know at a deeper level.
Examples of common questions/doubts:-
3,4,6 and 8 apply for me.
Sometimes the questions linger unanswered but at other times they get answered negatively such as "It is because I am stupid that I make these mistakes". these answers cause FEAR.
It seems too simple to reduce fear down to a question but logically when there is no question there is certainty and when I have certainty there is nothing to fear.
Certainty is the antidote to fear.
Unpredictability or uncertainty alone does not create fear (same as anger alone does not create tilt).
Underlying flaws in my approach to poker and to my learning are needed to create the intensity required to cause anxiety.
The end goal is NOT to eliminate uncertainty - it is to correct the underlying flaws in my logic that make me NEED certainty when I cannot really have it.
Without uncertainty there is no risk. Without risk there is nothing to gain, no edge to create, no profit to be made.
THIS CHAPTER IS MASSIVE FOR ME AND I ACTUALLY READ IT EARLIER DURING THIS STUDY PERIOD AND IT IS ALREADY IMPROVING MY ATTITUDE AT THE TABLES AND MY ABILITY TO PLAY AT MY BEST.
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Up to pdf page 79 - "Incomplete Information"
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So now it is time for a break!
Kind of a shame as feel like everything is building huge momentum. Maybe the rest will do will me good though. I am sure it will!
Good luck at the tables amigos. Just keep trying!
XXX